A Sad Week

This last week has been a sad week for me and so many others.  It began by being sad for me as September 19th was the due date for my Angel.  I wasn't sure how I would feel we are in a happy place now and that does help but it doesn't mean that we foget the little ones we lost before.  I was pretty emotional that day and cried about losing my little one for the first time in ages.  I think of them often but the tears don't come so often now it helps that we have this little one on the way it gives us a reason to move forward.  I don't want to forget I never will we have loved our baby since before we were expecting them and we love all our little ones regardless of wether they are here with us or waiting for us in heaven.  This due date was easier than the last I had just miscarried for the second time and I can't even describe the pain I felt that day I never want to feel that way again.

This last week has been sad for another reason too one of the girls in our DDC (due date club) just lost her sweet baby.  She was due only 2 days before me I can't imagine how she must be feeling now and my heart goes out to her and her family.  This and remembering my lost Angels really brings it home just how incredibly lucky and blessed we are to be expecting this little miracle and to never stop giving thanks for what we have been blessed with.  Just when you begin to feel "safe" and believe me that was a big step to feel "safe" in a pregnancy I suddenly realise there is no such thing! Anything can happen at any time and we must never take that for granted. Sweet Baby J we love you so very much and I enjoy every moment I feel you and all the good and not so good things about being pregnant I enjoy every moment because I know just how blessed we are to have you.  So im calling out to anyone whose reading this to go hug your children tell them how much you love them and enjoy every moment of pregnancy the good and the not so great parts (we all know what they are)! Because it's worth it all to be blessed with a miracle.

Halfway there!

It's about time I updated! Im happy to say that so far my second trimester has been pretty uneventful (in a good way) and im happy to keep things like that lol!  Overall im feeling much better only feeling sick if im hungry and sometimes at night but I can totally deal with that.  I still get pretty tired but then i've always felt tired even before pregnancy im just like that I guess so nothing new there haha.  I feel movements from my not so little baby bean daily and I love it although it's still so hard to connect that those movements are coming from a baby im not sure i'll ever believe it until Baby J arrives!!

I had my 20 week scan on Wednesday I was exactly 20 weeks and 6 days it felt like an eternity waiting for that day to come! I was so nervous and yet so excited at the same time! I had a detailed scan that was done by 2 Drs they were looking for signs of Arthrogryposis and any other problems that may be visable on a scan I was pretty nervous about the results but im happy to say that Baby J is growing well and is healthy! The Dr even used words like beautiful and perfect needless to say this was music to my ears!!  I LOVE my OB by the way she is awesome! Im usually pretty nervous around Drs but she makes me feel so at ease im so glad that she is my Dr through this journey!  After they had calmed my nerves and explained that everything is looking good I began to relax and really enjoy the scan I had a whole 30 minutes of watching my baby do everything from sleep to somersault it was amazing! Baby even gave us a little wave soooo cute!

Now for the BIG question are we on team BLUE or PINK??? Well we honestly don't know for sure! I was so excited to find out I just knew baby would be shy on the day!! Both Drs tried really hard to get a good view and based on what they saw they both agreed on a little GIRL! But didn't want to give a definite answer as the view wasn't clear little one just wasn't in the mood to flash lol!  Either way it doesn't matter to us boy or girl we love them so much already!! I have a 4d scan booked for Oct 29th so we are hoping for gender confirmation then the waiting is soooo hard!  I may end up being team green without meaning to be haha.  At least we will know for sure in January!! 

I do have a new scan picture to upload but I haven't scanned it in yet I will do that soon and I have a very obvious bump now YAY! So I will post pics next time! :)